Bromantic Obstables

When Friends Get in the Way

I, girlfriend, take thee, boyfriend and friends to be my partner/s. .. my pledge to stay by your and your friends side as your girlfriend in sickness and in health, in joy and when your friends give you a hard time, in good times and when you party with the boys and say ‘no girlfriends’ allowed, for as long as we both shall live or until relationships become obsolete.


I had a rare, surreal and rather unusual experience. I found myself on a weekend away with my ex-boyfriends friends. I mean, how often does that happen in life? We won’t go into exactly how I ended up in that bizarre situation. But, this somehow managed to work in my favour. I decided to put all the awkwardness aside, and see it as an opportunity, a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to gain some insider scoop, some after-the-fact knowledge and my, wasn’t I surprised.


If you have been lucky enough to be someone’s significant other, you’ll probably know what it’s like to go through the friend test. You’ve been working hard, making sure your relationship is on the straight and narrow, and things are probably going great – until you have to meet his friends. Personally, I think meeting the friends is on a much more superior and far more challenging level when compared to meeting the parents, in fact meeting the parent’s is a breeze.

Let’s face it, unless you’re into drugs, stripping or the proverbial (and recently more popular) gold-digging, you’re pretty much in the safe zone. If you really want my opinion, I think, his parents will be happy with just the mere fact that their little bundle of sunshine and joy managed to get a girl to date him in the first place - the memories and traumas of him not wanting to bath, barely shaving, partying all the time are enough for them to thank God for that decent woman who single-handedly managed to put him on right path.
But the friends, they are tough. The worst part is that they have powers; they manage to exert slightly more influence over his views and decisions. So, however hard you try, you cannot over-prepare for the dreaded encounter.

When it happens you’ll know. It’s got to be the same feeling I imagine criminals get during questioning, the shady room, with obscure sunlight gleaming in through half open blinds, not to mention the bright light aimed right in the dead centre of your eyes causing you to squint. You are actually being questioned. Are you good enough? Is she a justifiable reason for him to cut down on ‘boy’s night’ in favour of quality time? And trust me; they don’t let you have it easy.

"Girlfriends are the obstacle that gets in the way..."

Being with the friends of the ex, gave me a different perspective - an insider view. To my shock, horror, surprise I found out that: men aren’t really fond of the whole girlfriend thing. Girlfriends represent the transition from their friend being cool and fun to boring and caring (which is… Zzzz … and GAY – not my words or thoughts). Girlfriends are the obstacle that gets in the way of bourgeoning bromances reaching their full potential. Girlfriends spell the end of wing-men.

As a result, throughout a relationship, a girlfriend is involved in a struggle. Keeping a boyfriend happy is demanding enough without adding in the friend’s factor – and with them (who are not entirely happy with the situation in the first place) it becomes extremely problematic.

Bro’s before Ho’s is their mantra and they are sticking to it.

 So what now girls? Well you’ve gotta make the commitment to him and his friends – because when you first start dating him, you are dating him AND his friends.